Why good people do bad things

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I was asking the Universe a lot of questions last week about why some people get hurt and others do the hurting, and this is the response that came to me. Mind you, I don't hear Spirit or get big visions, I receive guided intuition and feel in my heart if it's right nor not. That's how I channel. It's still a learning process, but over this last year I have learned to listen and trust what comes through. What I was told was that the reason why some people hurt others, especially those they seemingly love and care about, is because they are not listening to their inner guidance, Spirit, etc. and are currently at a place where they are ego driven—which means they live off of fears, anger, base needs, wants, selfishness. It doesn't mean they're bad, it means they are in an infant stage of spiritual development and can't, and don't want to, change just yet. They could read the Bible all day, every day, but because they cling to the ego they're not going to feel how truly devastating some of their behavior is. When they hurt another person, it's a sickness. They are stuck in a dark place and can't feel because they are literally unwell in so many ways, but can't see it because they think it's normal.

Let's say you have a mother who won't allow her daughter to grow up. She won't buy her nice clothes, won't let her get her hair done, ears pierced, won't let her wear makeup or go out on any dates, and the daughter is old enough to do all of these things. The mother is being selfish, and to be honest, mean. She's stopping the girl's growth and free will because of what SHE wants, not what the daughter wants. If she steps back and directs things with a more heart-centered viewpoint, really listens to her daughter, she'll trust that all will be well by letting the girl make her own choices---something we all must do as we grow up and become adults. She's stuck in a place of fear because maybe when she was young she acted wild and got in trouble, or maybe she was never allowed to do anything and resents the fact. But still we ask, why. Why can't the mother know that she's being unreasonable? Why can't some people feel this inside of themselves? The answer is, they're not ready. Consider yourself lucky to be one of those with compassion and sensitivity. Send out light and love to those who aren't. Eventually they will develop these skills (we all do) through loss or change. But for now, they are incompetent and have no skills to understand.

Using another example, let's say you have a husband who won't let his wife go, even if she's told him that it's over and that she wants a divorce. He spies, manipulates, uses control tactics to keep her around--to the point where she could never love him again because he's violated her personal space so much and cut off her off from the world that she's now a victim. Even when she tells him how she feels, he's angry and says it's all her fault because she can't love him the way he wants. Why would he do that, knowing deep inside that it's driving her away, as opposed to making her want to come closer? The reason is he's afraid--so afraid that it's blinded him from feeling her inner turmoil and loss. He's afraid if he does try to understand her viewpoint, he'll lose a battle that he's set himself up to win--come hell or high water. And he must not lose. He'll lie, steal, spy, do anything to win. The truth is he won't win because you can't make someone love you. He has to find self-love, because when you learn how to love yourself, you can love and extend compassion to anyone and anything. Maybe when he was a child his mother left him for work. Maybe she HAD to work to pay the bills, but he took it as a personal attack. He's never gotten over that feeling of being abandoned, and now his wife has become his mother--he's angry and won't ever let it happen again. Once more, he has to learn to love himself. He has to understand that marriage and divorce can sometimes be part of the life cycle. It doesn't have to be personal, it just is. He can be whole and find happiness, but first he must let go of the toxic cycle, and move on so a healthier one can come to be. His wife will be healed, and he will be healed. They both win.

In any situation, the problem is we are all at different stages of spiritual/personal development. Some of us are beginners, some of us are experts. Send love out to all, and develop love inside of yourself, as a gift to yourself. That's where it starts. We are all conveyors of Divine Love. It starts with us, leaves us, heals us, heals each other, and comes back again. This doesn't mean you allow others to hurt you--that's actually the point: if you love yourself you won't allow others to hurt you, and you won't do the hurting.

I hope this helps. I'll try to write more as I'm inspired to do so. Thanks for reading and many blessings to you!

Peace.